I was taking the dog, Jazzy, for a walk up on Mt. Tabor one sunny morning when this fellow came up to me and strikes up this conversation:
(Mr. Slackjaw Simpleton): Hi, that's a nice doggy.
(Me:) Yep, he's a good boy, a bit rowdy at times, but a good boy none the less.
[pause... Mr. S is slack jawed, no doubt waiting for his new Vista OS to reboot]
(Mr S.): Oh. Is he tutored?
(Me - ponderous for a moment:) Why yes, in the classics.
(Mr S.): ?
(Me:) Yes, we just finished Shakespeare.
(Mr S.): Uh...
(Me): His favorite was the "Merchant of Venison", of course.
(Mr S.): Uh...
(Me): Well, Beowulf awaits, gotta go!
Mr S. Drool and a bit of steam from the ears.
Yes, I am an evil bastard and my tolerance for stupid people has not improved.
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